When I was young, I would find myself feeling dizzy while laying down. I wouldn’t recognize my own body, or my face, or my voice. The feeling would last just a few minutes; seconds, if I was lucky. Now the feeling can last days. Though this feeling has a name, dissociation, the younger me could only describe this feeling as feeling homesick, even if I was at home.

homesick is a series of 13 prints that highlight the personal experience I have with dissociation due to gender dysphoria, anxiety, and premenstrual dysphoric disorder. The pictures themselves are all related to nature due to the connection and love I have with the natural world. Nature in this series serves as a metaphor for my body and mind and the struggles between connection and disconnection to the physical world, and does so by showcasing the unique shadows of the environment and the unpredictability of the way the earth moves and grows.

Cyanotypes on handmade cotton paper, 8.5 in x 5.5 in